A favor to ask...

[Chuck]

Hi guys, as many of you know last year my daughter got into the studio and did a feat to a Mike Trout rap song that my buddy and his producer hooked up. The song was well received by the Trout family, Angels fans on social media and was even played on AM 830 (the Angels station). A year later, there's a new music producer who wants to make the song (the beat, music & flow) much better. 

So later this month we're headed back to the studio to completely redo the the song, though my daughter will still sing her parts as seen below in the lyrics. You can listen to the old version here.

The favor I'm asking of you is to look over the lyrics below (specifically the facts) to see if everything is correct, or ideas of content that should be added/replaced. Extra proofreading and fact checks is always helpful. My daughter Trinity was just 13 years old the time this was recorded, she's now going on 15 this month and will also re-record her part of the song which I believe she did very well.

Lyrics of "A Fish Like This"

[Tim] 
Our stream still flows 
While their lakes run dry 
Trout will spawn 
While the Angels fly 

Taking flight 
With an astronomical RBI 
Meet Mike, 
Our Millville Meteorite 

The media’s in tow 
As the season’s streamed live 
All at the way to the heavens with 
Twenty-seven ways to die 

Gravity defying 
When fielding in Anaheim 
Undeniably a match 
For greatest of all-time 

His streak can only grow 
Pitchers oughta opt to quit 
Once they “reel" from the first hit 
Expecting the opposite 

At 20 years old 
He’s a piranha in the mist 
With the gills and gall 
To crush ‘em all over the fence 

With the tenure of a rookie 
And a professional confidence 
There’s no question, 
Among us, a legend exists 

It seems he’ll never falter 
You can lead players to water 
But can you teach ‘em 
How to fish, like this!? 

CHORUS [Tim] 
Whether crushed to the left 
Or deep, center-right 
Their fence is neglected 
By Magic Mike 

Putting runs on the board 
Hear the ring and the crack 
As the Angels sing 
With every swing of his bat 

[Tim] 
We’re in flight now and it's 
Always the right crowd 
From the opening pitch 
Till the stadium’s, light’s out 

A star on the field, 
Stand up off the diamond 
With a generous light, 
Mike Trout 

“The Phenom” astounds 
Straight poundin’ the zone 
Striking low, never out 
At this plate called, “home" 

Taking the first pitch brings a 
Short, compact swing 
Making pitchers’ heads ring 
With a strength to crack bones 

With 100’s of home runs 
And stolen bases 
He leaves opposing players 
In tears with swollen faces 

Previous records he erases 
It’s been years since the league 
Has seen such a 
Winner Above Replacement 

Flying through the air 
Making catches with ease 
Reaching for the skies 
While others grasp at the trees 

In the '09 draft 
Passed by 21 teams? 
Now making an act out 
Of the acronyms 
In the M-L-B 

From M-V-P to W-A-R leader 
These two are just a part 
Of a running list 

It seems he’ll never falter 
You can lead a rookie to water 
But can you teach him 
How to fish, like this? 

[Trinity] 
Fans begin to gather 
Halos above their heads 
Wings spread wide as grins 
Feathers catch the wind 

Predators in the water 
Start to sneak in 
But no one ever taught ‘em 
How to swim 

CHORUS [Tim] 
Trout Farm on the left 
Trout Net, center-right 
Our fence is protected 
By Magic Mike 

Taking runs off the board 
Steady bringing ‘em back 
Letting the Angels sing 
With every leap and a catch 

Whether crushed to the left 
Or deep, center-right 
Their fence is neglected 
By Magic Mike 

Putting runs on the board 
Hear the ring and the crack 
As the Angels sing 
With every swing of his bat 

[Tim] 
With class, speed, power 
And a smile to increase his leverage 
It’s no wonder he’s compared 
To major league legends 

Back-to-back MVP 
Like Mays, Garvey, & Carter 
A feat unaccomplished 
Since Jr. Cal Ripken 

Bets against Trout are 
No doubt, a sticky gamble 
Features on ESPN 
Keep ya from switching the channel 

Channeling the 
Best of the majors, 
Wagered quick as Ricky Henderson 
Moonshots like Mickey Mantle 

To those who say his skill set 
Is merely unilateral, 
Why would Sports Illustrated 
Declare him supernatural? 

Just for the “halibut?" 
We’ll give ‘em a line test 
Let their damaging press 
Sink down into collateral 
  
While haters state their claims 
With a clear defiance 
His fans won’t fan those flames 
They’ll defeat the tyrants 

It doesn’t take two kids 
In an 80’s basement trying 
To make the best ball player 
No longer a Weird Science 

[Trinity] 
Fans begin to gather 
Halos above their heads 
Wings spread wide as grins 
Feathers catch the wind 

Predators in the water 
Start to sneak in 
But no one ever taught ‘em 
How to swim 

Fans begin to gather 
Halos above their heads 
Right outside the fence 
Feathers catch the wind 

Predators in the water 
Never learned to swim 
They’ll sink to the bottom 
As Angels win 

CHORUS [Tim] 
Trout Farm on the left 
Trout Net, center-right 
Our fence is protected 
By Magic Mike 

Taking runs off the board 
Steady bringing ‘em back 
Letting the Angels sing 
With every leap and a catch 

Whether crushed to the left 
Or deep, center-right 
Their fence is neglected 
By Magic Mike 

Putting runs on the board 
Hear the ring and the crack 
As the Angels sing 
With every swing of his bat

https://timstiles.bandcamp.com/track/a-fish-like-this-feat-trinity-richter

 

[Chuck]

 

[Chuck]

Aight guys, I know most of you may not like rap music (not my preference personally) but if some of you can give the lyrics a quick spot check for factual comfort I'd appreciate it. 

[tdawg87]

He was never a "back-to-back MVP" so that whole verse will need to be changed (or just get rid of it).

Also the "At 20 years old" line is kinda weird since he's 26.

"With the tenure of a rookie" doesn't fit anymore.

 

[Dave Saltzer]

Agreed about the rookie and 20 year old bits. And, at 201 career Hrs, it's a bit grammatical to say hundreds if home runs. 

 

Again, this is being a bit nitpicky, but I wanted to give it the thorough review that you deserve. I'm sure it will be fine, especially if Trout is already on board with it. 

[Sully151]

This has more lyrics than a Black Eyed Peas song.

[Chuck]

11 hours ago, tdawg87 said:

He was never a "back-to-back MVP" so that whole verse will need to be changed (or just get rid of it).

Also the "At 20 years old" line is kinda weird since he's 26.

"With the tenure of a rookie" doesn't fit anymore.

 

Thanks @tdawg87 & @Dave Saltzer

[Chuck]

11 hours ago, tdawg87 said:

He was never a "back-to-back MVP" so that whole verse will need to be changed (or just get rid of it).

Also the "At 20 years old" line is kinda weird since he's 26.

"With the tenure of a rookie" doesn't fit anymore.

 

The writer is referring to Mike Trout's back to back All Star Game MVP's.

Agreed on 26, but I think the writer was referring to his 20's. Need to rethink that and come up with something else.. 

I think the "with the tenure of a rookie" line was to say he plays like a young talent and the next line says "And a professional confidence" 

[Blarg]

9 hours ago, Sully151 said:

This has more lyrics than a Black Eyed Peas song.

Agreed this is not supposed to be the Iliad or a Boras client pitch. The Beattles made a fortune off of Love Me Do and it has five stanzas, four of which are repeating. That is one stanza more than your Chorus. 

The Chorus is almost a song entirely by itself. The rest is getting dragged down trying to add stuff like wins above relacement and other metrics, which are great formulas but not great poetry. 

Mike Trout is baseball poetry. I'd do some serious editing to reveal the poetry.

Edited November 28, 2017 by Blarg

[Chuck]

26 minutes ago, Blarg said:

Agreed this is not supposed to be the Iliad or a Boras client pitch. The Beattles made a fortune off of Love Me Do and it has five stanzas, four of which are repeating. That is one stanza more than your Chorus. 

The Chorus is almost a song entirely by itself. The rest is getting dragged down trying to add stuff like wins above relacement and other metrics, which are great formulas but not great poetry. 

Mike Trout is baseball poetry. I'd do some serious editing to reveal the poetry.

Despite the lengthy lyrics, the song is just 4 minutes long. The tempo is fast. Rap songs are typically like this though. 

[totdprods]

25 minutes ago, Chuckster70 said:

Despite the lengthy lyrics, the song is just 4 minutes long. The tempo is fast. Rap songs are typically like this though. 

4 minutes is pretty long. When my the groups on my label are focusing on a radio single (which isn't too relevant in this instance since you aren't seeking max radio play) we try to keep it 2-2:30, 3 mins max.

[Chuck]

5 minutes ago, totdprods said:

4 minutes is pretty long. When my the groups on my label are focusing on a radio single (which isn't too relevant in this instance since you aren't seeking max radio play) we try to keep it 2-2:30, 3 mins max.

Duly noted. We may end up killing a couple verses to shorten it up a bit. 

[totdprods]

19 minutes ago, Chuckster70 said:

Duly noted. We may end up killing a couple verses to shorten it up a bit. 

I think that would def be the best course. Any verse that feels the slightest bit flimsy or forced lyrically should get axed. Only give them the best of the best. Make that your 'radio-edit'.

You can always record an extended version with every verse.

If you're looking for it to be used in media/promo vids, only about 30 secs will be used, max. You would be surprised how much music can be covered in half a minute, and more often than not commercials and promo vids only sample 15-20 seconds max.

[Chuck]

8 minutes ago, totdprods said:

I think that would def be the best course. Any verse that feels the slightest bit flimsy or forced lyrically should get axed. Only give them the best of the best. Make that your 'radio-edit'.

You can always record an extended version with every verse.

Sounds like a plan! 

Also, what did you think of my daughter's work on the bridge @totdprods? Not bad for a 13 year old eh.

[Angelsfan1984]

I would do the following:

Fade in more sounds of announcers.

Drop any verse where the male vocals have to stutter in the line (or reword the line to avoid the stutter).

See if you can overlap the female vocals into more of a hook or chorus and layer that over the male vocals.

Also, you may want to see if there's an issue saying "magic mike", they may have it copyrighted.

[totdprods]

Just now, Chuckster70 said:

Sounds like a plan! 

Also, what did you think of my daughter's work on the bridge @totdprods? Not bad for a 13 year old eh.

Definitely solid - bridges are tricky business and it worked! She needs to keep it up! Music biz is just staying active in the game and anything can happen. Stay active and stay productive.

[Chuck]

1 hour ago, totdprods said:

Definitely solid - bridges are tricky business and it worked! She needs to keep it up! Music biz is just staying active in the game and anything can happen. Stay active and stay productive.

Yeah she's been singing in an 80's youth rock band for 3 years now. Her band has a gig this Saturday at a local pub. Yes, us parents get to drink and watch our kids perform.

Here's a classic she did a couple years ago at the local pub. They've come a long way since.

[John Taylor]

I will be sorely disappointed if this song doesn't end up in the regular rotation of worship music at local OC Churches. All hail the Lord God Trout.

 

My specialty is IT so I don't have much to add to the song, but I really enjoyed the original release. Can't wait for the remix!

[Chuck]

15 minutes ago, John Taylor said:

I will be sorely disappointed if this song doesn't end up in the regular rotation of worship music at local OC Churches. All hail the Lord God Trout.

 

My specialty is IT so I don't have much to add to the song, but I really enjoyed the original release. Can't wait for the remix!

Thanks @John Taylor!!

[Dick Enberg]

4 hours ago, Angelsfan1984 said:

Also, you may want to see if there's an issue saying "magic mike", they may have it copyrighted.

My oh my, Thinking "magic mike" ties to much to Tatum and his stripper film. Maybe use Majestic Mike or something along those lines.

[makepeac]

Hey Dick, wasn’t your catchphrase just “Oh my!”?

[Tank]

don't ever question the Enberg.

never.

[Dick Enberg]

11 hours ago, makepeac said:

Hey Dick, wasn’t your catchphrase just “Oh my!”?

yes, but changed the phrase when Mike Trout arrived...